Megan Fox's Mercenary Movie, "Rogue", is As Ridiculous As You'd Imagine it To Be

As it turns out, a movie in which Megan Fox portrays a battle-hardened mercenary is about as ridiculous as you'd imagine it to be. After being hired by an African bigwig to liberate his kidnapped daughter, Fox's Samantha O'Hara leads a team of soldiers-of-fortune on a snatch-and-grab mission in an unnamed African country. Things go awry, everyone questions O'Hara's leadership (including her) and the survivors find themselves stranded on an abandoned "lion farm" where poachers raise the big cats to be hunted for sport by wealthy tourists. After developing a taste for killing humans, one of the escaped felines on the farm goes rogue and proceeds to hunt O'Hara's team down one-by-one. So, as you can imagine, the big predator gets plenty of screen time.

But one of the myriad problems with Rogue is that when lions play a key role in your movie, you should spring for authentic-looking lions. Unfortunately, the CGI is so shoddy that the singing furballs from last year's Cats look like cinematic perfection by comparison.

A hot mess from beginning to end, Rogue's casting Fox as a special forces badass is so off that it'll make you miss Jesse Eisenberg's Lex Luthor in Batman v. Superman. However, the film's worst issues involve its handling of race. A  jihadist group clearly meant to be a stand-in for Boko Haram is responsible for the aforementioned kidnappings. But where the real Boko Haram made international headlines for abducting Nigerian schoolgirls, Rogue's filmmakers saw fit to make its victims caucasian young women who were -- coincidentally -- shanghai'd from their school. This whitewashing is compounded by the fact that the lone surviving Black member of the rescue team, Pata, is singled out for berating and scolding by said schoolgirls. Naturally, he doesn't live to see the end credits -- none of the non-white characters do.

If you really wanna see a VIP's kid get rescued amidst a hail of bullets, I advise you to just watch Extraction again. Skip this trash.
  
Now streaming on VOD platforms.

The Best Movie Prospects for 2021 (with Trailers)

Tom Cruise will debut two huge sequels next year. And Batman will get a do-over. Speaking of comic book movies, 2021 will look a lot like 2016: Superman, Batman and the Suicide Squad will finally return to theaters. For the first time, the MCU's rolling four movies out in one year (Shang-Chi and the Legend of the Ten Rings, Spider-Man 3, The Eternals and Black Widow) but Shang-Chi's the only one that looks promising so far. DC will have two big releases: The Suicide Squad and The Snyder Cut. 

Outside the Wire

Release Date: January 15

As far as I can tell from the trailer, Outside the Wire features Anthony Mackie as a humanoid drone in the military of the future. Although it'll debut exclusively on Netflix, the action looks big screen-worthy so I'm in.









Judas and the Black Messiah

Release Date: February 12

Finally, Hollywood takes on COINTELPRO, federal government's concerted -- and successful -- effort to undermine and dismantle Black Power organizations in the 1960s.

Coming 2 America

Release Date: March 5

The follow-up to 1988 comedy classic Coming to America has finally gotten the greenlight from Paramount Pictures -- and with star and comedy legend Eddie Murphy on board, to boot. Murphy will reprise his role as Prince Akeem Joffer, the heir to the throne of the fictional African kingdom of Zamunda. Craig Brewer, who helmed Hustle & Flow, is the director of a screenplay written by "black-ish" co-creator Kenya Barris. The story will reportedly center on Akeem returning to America in order to meet the son he never knew he had.

Though the film's reportedly been in development for years, the phenomenonal success of 2018's Black Panther likely prompted a frantic Hollywood search for similar properties. Given the similarities between BP and Coming to America -- each movie features a predominantly Black cast and a story about a prince's ascendancy to the throne of a wealthy African kingdom -- the prospect of a Coming to America sequel likely had studio executives chomping at the bit. And moviegoers will soon have two African royal families to watch on the big screen.

The problem is, as funny as he is, Eddie Murphy has a horrible track record when it comes to sequels. Both Another 48 Hours and The Nutty Professor II were ginormous steps down from their respective predecessors and the Beverly Hills Cop films just got worse and worse with each new installment. But someone as hilarious as Eddie Murphy doesn't just forget how to make people laugh. So we'll see.

City of Lies

Release Date: March 19

Johnny Depp makes his comeback in a film based on a true story about police corruption that was completed years ago but never actually made it to American theaters. Until now. In his best movie to date, Depp portrays late LAPD detective Russell Poole, who uncovered more than he bargained for when he endeavored to solve the murder of legendary rapper Christopher "Biggie" Wallace. 

The Many Saints of Newark

Release Date: March 12 Moved to September 24

Even without the late James Gandolfini, the idea of this Sopranos movie
hitting theaters is compelling -- except for one thing: The film'll be a
prequel and what made the long-running Sopranos television series special
was its focus on the MODERN mafia. The time period in which the movie's set
will likely put it in the Goodfellas/Casino/Donnie Brasco era -- which we've obviously seen before. So this film will live or die by whatever new take the filmmakers can bring to the table.

Morbius

Release Date: March 19 October 8 Moved to January 21, 2022

Marvel's second-most famous vampire (the most famous is Blade, of course) will be making his big screen debut in this origin story about Michael Morbius, a scientist who accidentally turns himself into a living bloodsucker after an attempt to cure himself of a rare illness results in unforeseen side effects.

Justice League: The Snydercut

Release Date: March 18

After three long years of campaigning, fans of the original DCEU (which includes Man of Steel, Batman v. Superman and Suicide Squad) and director Zack Snyder succeeding in convincing Warner Bros. management to fund the completion of Snyder's version of Justice League. Snyder was removed from the project when executives panicked following negative critical reviews for BvS and Suicide Squad (though both were hits with fans and brought in hefty profits) and replaced with Joss Whedon, who essentially made an entirely different film. Though Whedon's movie was intended to please critics, it disappointed moviegoers and consequently cost the studio an estimated $60 million in losses.

Now, the product of Snyder's original vision is set to debut on streaming service HBO Max at some undetermined time in March. The Superman, the Batman, Cyborg, Aquaman, the Flash and Wonder Woman will all face-off against Darkseid and his lieutenant Steppenwolf in a four-hour movie.

No Time to Die

Release Date: April 2 Moved to October 8

No Time to Die was initially scheduled to hit theaters in April 2020, which is the strangest part of its release date move, given that so many past James Bond movies have debuted in November. The 25th 007 flick later landed where it always should've been -- November 2020. But due to the ice-cold reception to the movies that debuted in theaters between late August and early October, No Time was shifted to nearly a year after its original release date. 

A Quiet Place II

Release Date: April 23 Moved to September 17 Moved again to May 28

Without Remorse

Release Date: April 30

Without Remorse belongs to the Tom Clancy collection of films and television shows adapted from his books (The Hunt for Red October, Patriot Games, Clear and Present Danger, The Sum of All Fears, Shadow Recruit, Jack Ryan). And frankly, it's refreshing to see one of these stories not revolve around CIA analyst and supposed desk jockey Jack Ryan. This one is about Navy SEAL Senior Chief John Kelly, originally portrayed by Willem Dafoe in Clear and Present Danger and later Liev Schrieber in The Sum of All Fears. But now, burgeoning action star Michael B. Jordan has taken over the role.









Free Guy

Release Date: May 21 Moved to August 13

Since Free Guy is about a mediocre dude who doesn't realize that he lives inside of a video game who falls for a woman of action who shows up outta nowhere, it seems to pretty much be a live-action version of The LEGO Movie. But the visuals look great, so let's do this.

Ghostbusters: Afterlife

Release Date: June 11 Moved to November 11

The Ghostbusters saga will try to repair the damage done by the 2016 reboot with this true sequel that pretends that that bucket of dishwater never even happened -- Terminator: Dark Fate-style. Hopefully, this movie doesn't also turn out to be a bucket of dishwater -- Terminator: Dark Fate-style. Picking up over three decades after Ghostbusters II, Afterlife will feature new busters alongside Winston, Peter and Ray.

In the Heights

Release Date: June 18

Maverick

Release Date: July 2 Moved to November 19

Producing a sequel to an iconic film which revisits iconic characters
several years later is always a dicey proposition. As Rocky Balboa, Live
Free or Die Hard and Blade Runner 2049 prove, it can absolutely be a
worthwhile endeavor. But for every Creed there's a Kingdom of the Crystal
Skull. The results mostly depend on the skill and approach of the director
and writer.

Shang-Chi and the Legend of the Ten Rings

Release Date: July 9 Moved to September 3

In Shang-Chi, the MCU will debut its second movie featuring a mostly minority cast and the first appearance of the real Mandarin, Iron Man's arch-nemesis from the comics. Unfortunately, Awkwafina seems to have a sizable role. 

Dune

Release Date: September 17 Moved to October 1 Moved again to October 22

The new Dune is a do-over for the 1984 mega-flop starring Sting and a pre-Star Trek Patrick Stewart that cost the studio an estimated $23 million. With Blade Runner 2049's Denis Villanueve behind the wheel, it's a good bet that no matter how much money the remake brings in, it'll at least be a better movie.

Updated 6/30/21

The Snydercut Trailer Drops...with Some Interesting Easter Eggs

After three long years of campaigning, fans of the original DCEU (which includes Man of Steel, Batman v. Superman and Suicide Squad) and director Zack Snyder succeeding in convincing Warner Bros. management to fund the completion Snyder's version of Justice League. Snyder was removed from the project when executives panicked following negative critical reviews for B v. S and Suicide Squad (though both were hits with fans and brought in hefty profits) and replaced with Joss Whedon, who essentially made an entirely different film. Though Whedon's movie was intended to please critics, it disappointed moviegoers and consequently cost the studio an estimated $60 million in losses.

Now, the product of Snyder's original vision is set to debut on streaming service HBO Max at some undetermined time in 2021. The Superman, the Batman, Cyborg, Aquaman, the Flash and Wonder Woman will all face-off against Darkseid and his lieutenant Steppenwolf in a four-part miniseries that'll also be presented as a four-hour movie.

The trailer was released during DC's Fandome event on August 22 and eagle-eyed viewers will notice some interesting sights during the roughly two-and-a-half minute teaser. By now, most DCEU fans are aware that Kal-El will be rocking a black suit and cape for part of the movie. But it's the items on display during the probable "Knightmare" scene depicting a conquered Earth that'll come as shockers. For one, a singed Joker card can be seen floating through the air above the what's left of Wayne Manor. A brief glimpse of a portrait of Thomas Wayne is visible amidst the debris as well. Finally, Aquaman's trident is clearly visible just a few feet away.

What does all this mean? And more importantly, when will Zack Snyder's Justice Leage finally debut? I guess we have more waiting to do.

"The Personal History of David Copperfield" Early Review

Author Charles Dickens died in 1870 but he's still making money. Not only has he written over a dozen popular novels and novellas but many of them have been adapted to film, some several times. Just three years ago, an excellent big screen adaptation of his most well-known work, A Christmas Carol, hit theaters. This year, because of the COVID-19 pandemic, we'll have to settle for a cinematic version of one of his books not as familiar to audiences releasing to VOD platforms.

Instead of a holiday ghost story, The Personal History of David Copperfield is the fictional life-story of its Victorian-era title character. After spending the first few years of his life in childhood bliss, the young and imaginative David's widowed mother marries the cold-hearted but wealthy Mr. Murdstone, who brings his equally cruel sister into the family. David's abusive new stepfather forces him into child labor at his factory. Eventually, David's mother dies and he's informed -- after the funeral -- in a particularly callous way. This last indignity prompts David to run away to the estate of his weird aunt, Betsey Trotwood, who has an equally eccentric tenant. 

David Copperfield follows the British tradition of color-blind casting, which makes for a much more ethnically diverse array of characters than originally intended by the Dickens. And unless you're a stickler for historic accuracy, the less homogenized look is sure to please. The story is executed fairly faithfully, which makes the story itself -- not the adaptation -- the only real problem. The movie actually could've benefited from a less steadfast narrative. Everything starts off excellently but heads straight off a cliff by the end.

Copperfield arrives on VOD on August 28.

"The Stranger" is a White Feminist Mess

Mobile streaming service Quibi's newest movie, The Stranger, starts off intriguingly enough. Aspiring writer Clare pays the bills by driving for a rideshare service. But when her latest fare, Carl, pulls a knife and lets her know that he just murdered a family in the Hollywood hills mansion where she picked him up, Clare's previously normal night becomes the worst one of her life. After escaping Carl's clutches by wrecking her SUV on purpose, Clare discovers that not only does his skill-set include hacking (Of course. What internet troll/incel doesn't know his way around a computer?), but that he'd rather play a game of cat-and-mouse than murder her outright.

Just when The Stranger veers off into predictable thriller territory, Clare meets JJ, who's not only as intelligent and internet-savvy as Carl, he's also Indian-American, which is something that you really don't see very often (if at all) in these types of movies. The movie's even self-aware enough to give JJ a line about his internet know-how making him a cliche'. On the contrary, he's actually a pretty fully-fleshed out character. Even more surprising, JJ's resourcefulness and street smarts keep them alive and off the radar of both Carl and the LAPD (Carl eventually frames them for killing a cop) -- for awhile, anyway. The blonde and the Indian even bond and share an intimate (but non-sexual, of course) moment.  

But then JJ is killed off. And he doesn't even go out with a fight! So The Stranger finally becomes the celebration of white feminism that it's been threatening all along (Even after a nameless Latina is murdered, at least we had JJ). By the end of the movie, the white girl who's still carrying her Yorkie (Pebbles) around in a bag outsmarts the cartoonish misogynist and leaves him for dead, finally stepping into her birthright as the film's Final Girl. 

In a finale that made very little sense (it's still not completely clear how Clare caused Carl's BMW to crash), the killer is bumped off by a pack of coyotes that appear out of nowhere just in time. That car crash is a pretty good metaphor for the movie itself, to be honest.

Maybe one of these days, Hollywood will realize that slasher films (not too mention most other genres) don't have to revolve around white girls. And they certainly don't have to be the lone survivor.

"Tesla" Early Review

On paper, a biopic about legendary inventor Nikola Tesla starring Ethan Hawke seems like potential Oscar-bait. But since the filmmakers apparently believed that weirdness was synonymous with quality cinema, they ended up producing a hot mess instead of a watchable movie -- much less an award-worthy film. This movie has fourth wall-breaking monologues, an imaginary ice cream fight and made-up conversations between Tesla and Thomas Edison. And although the  events take place in the 19th century, there are references to Google and Photoshop. At one point, a MacBook appears onscreen. Don't get me started on the karaoke performance of Tears for Fears' "Everybody Wants to Rule the World". I'm not even joking. You really have to see this bucket of dishwater to believe how lame it is -- except no one in search of entertainment should see it. You've been warned.  

If you like punishing yourself, Tesla debuts on VOD on August 21.

"Magic Camp" Conjures Up Good Clean Fun

Magic Camp is a throwback to two kinds of movies that don't come around much anymore: Family movies that aren't animated and summer camp comedies. If you liked Meatballs, Little Darlings or even American Pie Presents: Band Camp but wish you could watch them with the crumbsnatchers then Magic Camp is for you. There's no nudity or sex; just hijinks and self-discovery. MC also happens to be the best film about magicians since The Prestige and Sleight.

When 12-year-old Theo can't get over the death of his dad, his mom sends him off to the Institute of Magic for the summer (Theo's dad taught him a few magic tricks before he kicked-the-bucket). But like any good summer camp movie, the story's also about the counselors. Former IM attendee turned failed magician/cab driver Andy Tuckerman is lured back as an instructor by the Institute's founder Roy Preston when the latter reveals that Andy's former flame and act partner turned superstar illusionist Kristina Darkwood will also be returning. Of course, Theo has to come-of-age, discover romance and overcome bullies alongside a group of misfits and goofballs. Meanwhile, Andy has to resolve his past issues in order to get on with life. C'mon man, that's how these movies go. Like your average magic act, it may be predictable but it's no less entertaining.

Available to stream on Disney+.

"Coco" Movie Review

by John Zenoni

I love Disney & Pixar movies and cannot believe it has taken me 3 years since its release for me to watch ‘Coco.’ This is a visually stunning film and one that has such special meaning since it's about family and remembering those who have gone on before us. What I love about this film is that, while it focuses on the annual Mexican celebration Día de Muertos (Day of the Dead), which is a time when families gather to honor and remember deceased loved ones (it is believed that the souls of the dead return to visit the living families in homes, businesses and cemeteries), this is a cultural celebration whose meaning applies to each and everyone of us. The animation, colors and music in this film are all amazing and if you don’t feel your heart being tugged on at the end of this film then you need to have your it checked. 'Coco' is a beautiful film.